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I AM A HAPPY-MAN...
I am a sane man. I am an attractive man.
I think my liver is in the right order.
I know everything about a healthy living,
And I am sure, that I live in the correct way.
I was treated and always take my medicine,
I respect medicine and doctors. What\'s more,
I am not superstitious in any way; to be honest,
I disrespect any person, who has not pledged the
Hippocrates\'s oath. (I\'m sufficiently erudited
to be superstitious, but I am not.) Yes, Sir,
I accept all treatments out of my pseudo-genius.
Now, you will be certainly enough of a bad person
To not understand this. Well, Sir, but I can
Comprehend it. I will, of course, be unable to
Explain to you, why I am happy to be a test-subject
In this case of my sanity; I know perfectly
Well that I will not „mess thing up“ for my shrinks
By not taking their treatment; I know better than
Anyone, that by all this I am condoning only others
And everyone else. But, still, if I get treated, it
Is out of my good Samaritan\'s will. My liver is fine;
Well, I hope it will be fine for all eternity!

I\'ve been living like this for a long time --- about
Thirty years. I\'m thirty-two, now. I used to be in the
Gaming writing business; I no longer am. I was a
Gonzo journalist. I was polite, and took pleasure in it.
After all, I accepted no pay for my reviews, so that\'s that.
(It\'s true, GAME. EXE magazine was the best, but I took
No honor in it. I wrote it, thinking it would become a
Best-seller; but, now, seeing for myself, that I simply
Was arrogant and conceited --- I quit everything, and
Started this diary --- this is its first entry.) When
Readers would write to me about, who I am --- I\'d gnash
My teeth at them, and felt an inexhaustible delight, when
I managed to uplift someone. I almost always made fun.
My co-editors were prodigious people for the most part:
Those co-editors, you know. But among them there were no
Equals to me. I simply accepted myself as the best and
Kept producing line-after-line of satirious rattling. I
Was at war with everyone at the office and, in the end,
I burned out. I stopped rattling. However, that was still
In my youth. But, do you know, tavarishchie, what was the
Main point about my gonzo ways? The whole thing precisely
Was the greatest bile, I was simply frightened to be what
I wasn\'t, and I pleased myself with humour. I\'m foaming
At the mouth, but bring me some Coca-Cola, give me some
Cox with it, and maybe I\'ll calm down. I suffered from
Insomnia for my first eighteen physical years, out of shame.
Such is my Creed!

And I lied about myself just now, when I said I was humourous.
I lied, because I\'m serious. I was simply doing, what I wanted;
Both with the Reader and with myself as an Author, but as a matter
Of fact, I was never able to become entertaining. I was conscious
Every moment of so very many elements in myself in opposition to
What I am. I knew there was a Wunderkinde Homunculus living in my
Brain, asking to be let-out out of me, but I would not let him,
I would not, I purposely would not let him out. The homunculus,
The rascal, tormented me to the point of shame; he drove me to
Convulsions, and --- finally, I got sick of him, oh, how sick I got!
However, I assure you that it is NOT all the same to me!

I\'ll live to be a century!
I\'ll live to be a millennium!
I\'ll live to be... a Happy-Man!
2022-04-21 09:13
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2022-04-25 10:25
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2022-04-21 11:14
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